Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Goals

Quote from a book I am reading

'Every man has the same final destination: death at the end of life's road. But the path we travel makes all the difference. Some of us have maps and goals. Others are just lost'.

When I was manic I had a definite vision. I could see my path in technicolour! I felt like I had a purpose and a goal: Doing good and spreading love and the beauty of vipassana where I could. Now I no longer feel that way - I think that's one of the hardest parts to depression - namely that you feel directionless.. that you have no purpose!. I am trying to find my way again. I think what's really important to me is family and friends. Work is secondary to that. In fact work has a pretty low priority. Well, kinda.. I do believe the maxim that "no one on their death bed ever wishes they'd spent more time in the office".

That said, I am currently going through a phase where I'm trying to work out what job I want to do. I'm really thinking of becoming a maths teacher. I dunno if I will or not - but it seems like a good job. Besides the long holidays and the reasonable working hours you're passing on knowledge and have a chance to see kids develop. Could be good.. just dunno if I could control a class. Part of me thinks I could.. and part of me is dead scared!.

1 Comments:

Blogger Suzy Dior said...

I understand some of what you have gone through. I have done a lot of meditations with various outcomes. I have my own thoughts on what has happened, but never having met you its probably best to reserve comment. The mind is a mysterious thing and said we only use 10% of it. Biomagnetism Therapy put my thoughts and head back together after intense meditations at vipassana. Without that it could have taken a lot longer. Strange what you can do to yourself just by using the mind in different ways. Vipssana, learnt a lot. Also about our 'real'world and how programmed we are. Such fun. I'm better now, just feel and know everything anyone is thinking or feeling without even knowing them or speaking to them. How? Sensitizing the mind and training it to notice things that usually are programmed out of us with busy lives. So thats how I do my treatments. With sensitivity and that why they work in the most part. Each of us has skills they train in and the mind is mine. Come and see me one day or skype sometime to talk about bioeergetics . power of the mind. with light and love Suzy

2:52 PM  

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